During last week’s class I had come to realize that it is
easy to have values, ideals, goals, and dreams.
Yes, having them is easy. The difficulty starts when you decide to live them. The last post-it note I kept was labeled
"true to self." By "true
to self" I mean knowing who you are, your identity, what you value, and
what you believe. But at the same time, I also refer to being accepting of
yourself, both your flaws and strengths.
For me, I have struggled to fully accept myself, until recently, as
gay.
In Jessie J's song, "Who You Are," I found the
following verses to hold the most meaning for me:
Why am I doing this to myself?
I nearly left the real me on the
self
Don't lose who you are in the blur
of the starts
Its ok to not be ok
Sometimes it's hard to follow you
heart
Tears don't mean you losing,
everybody's bruising
Just be true to who you are
There's nothing wrong with who you
are
In CTW with Dr. Carroll, my class has read
"The Left Hand of Darkness" by Ursula Le Guin, which talks about how
being vulnerable and open to others is the only way you can make lasting and
fulfilling relationships. For the past
four years, I had been doing the opposite by building up walls and
"leaving the real me on the shelf."
In my fear of accepting who I am I had lost the very definition of
myself. I chose this song to realize my
lack of congruence and to take the steps I need to better emulate being true to
myself. With all the voices of fear in
my head arguing with what I feel in my heart, I have truly come to know and
will continue to learn the meaning of "sometimes its hard to follow your
heart." The only change I would
make to that lyric is to remove sometimes.
At least for me, "it's hard to follow your heart" holds more
weight.
In the post-it note exercise, I noticed how many people had
difficulty choosing which note to recycle.
While I shared in this frustration, I knew exactly which post-it would
not be recycled.
PS: I would appreciate it if everyone would keep this within
our emerging leaders class, at least for now.
Thanks!
I also found some great photos from Facebook that I think
really applies to what we are learning in class and I wanted to share with you
guys:
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=491276450914917&set=a.419797571396139.90549.418156928226870&type=1&relevant_count=1
Good post! Sounds like your CTW rocks...what's it called?
ReplyDeleteAllowing yourself to be your true self, to be vulnerable, to be open around others is critical to all aspects of life. Nothing could be more vulnerable, for example, than failure--and we've all failed. Even those who have succeeded have failed, because otherwise they would not know true success.
You might like what researcher Brené Brown has to say in her TED Talks. I posted them on my blog, and you can find them on YouTube. She talks a lot about vulnerability and openness.
Thanks Anthony! The CTW is linked with C&I (Professors Carroll and Pappas, respectively) and is titled "Art and Identity."
ReplyDeleteI saw your post just haven't gotten to watching the videos or commenting yet, will hopefully do that today....
See you tomorrow!
Not to pick favorites but this might be the best post so far... You are an amazing person Glen and it sounds like you have been on quite the journey. It takes so much strength to stand up and reveal your "true self," and I congratulate you on being so courageous.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I loved that you picked J.K. Rowling quotes for your post, I think her messages are terribly underrated.
Thanks for sharing Glen!
Thanks Christine! I am so glad to be in a place with classmates like you that are supportive and accepting! See you in class!
ReplyDelete